new shit to mike

hideing behind your walls

you think no one can get in

you think no one cares

shes trying to hold on

but you push her so hard

like you pushed me

alone, you think it's better that way

put on that mask and expect no one to see it

you're not fooling anyone

we all see past your lies

your the one stopping yourself from happiness

your hideing from love

i give up

not careing anymore

can't make you belive

can't get you to trust

you wont take a chance

wont take a step closer

dead already

but because you want that

holding so much pain

because you refusse to let it go

i dont want to help

because you've pushed me too far

dont want to care

because you care for nothing anyway

stuck in your darkness

while im happy in the lights

theres nothing i can do for you

no one can help you

you're alone because you want to be

so i'll leave you alone

wont give any help

i turn my back to you

walk away, i wont watch

Author's Notes/Comments: 

to mike, i reffuse to watch you kill yourself

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Asheron's picture

Look I won't just give up. I'm not quitting, I am just slowing down. I have so much more to worry about right now then falling in love. My time will come when it comes and I am okay with that. I know you and everyone else wants to see me happy, but I just found out I am a daddy. There is nothing else in the world that matters to me right now. I am honestly happy. I mean think of it this way... I have spent my whole life looking for a reason for me to be here, and I found it. The first time I was at my daughters house, and she kept showing off her toys, and hollering "Daddy look, daddy look" I was honestly happy. Whe she came and sat in my lap by herself... That is when I found my whole world. Like I said, I don't need anyone right now, and I am okay with that. I am honestly happy. I found the best thing in the world, my daughter. Everything else I can waite for, she is my life and my world, my whole reason to live and that makes it all worth while. Trust me you will completly understand when you have you little boy or girl. I know my life isn't complet till I find the right woman to share it with, but Right now I have reason to be here, and because of hailey I will always have a reason to be here, if I find a gf or not I still have something to be happy about. I go to sleep everynight with a smile on my face now and wake up with one too because I am a daddy. Nothing else matters. So belive me when I say I didn't give up, and I wont give up either. I just slowed down.

Asheron Fireshadow

Trista Calderara's picture

What do you do when it's hurts to walk away, but it's even more painful to stay? this question I've asked myself ever since I let him into my heart 3 years ago, and I'm no closer to the answer than I was back then