Alone because

why am i sending away all the good guys? that is my newest thought

i figure it out after i send them away

one thought could be that i do not think i deserve a good guy in my life possibly, but i know i am worthy  so it makes zero sense

oh wait i know i just remembered why:

I am ready, but still married...

and i wonder if they all seek my body because of this

one told me he was God sent and i think i know everything ...

i know nothing and i operate from that lol

sometimes it's deeper than one might think, i wish the god sends would just see it

it is always deeper, but most people just see what they want to see putting people into a box that no one, them included, can fit into

we all do it too, but i try not to... i cannot believe that i do it still

I am taking steps to be clear and free, I have issues that i must address and feel like no one should have to deal with my mess

eagerness is a constant and feeling like i am at the brink of a new existence fills me it's overwhelming yet i seek to enjoy my space, my freedom and live....

i was once told by many on separate occasions that i had been created to start their new nations,

they coupled me off and set me to the side

until i was ripe and and could stand the ride

life is a sea of changing tide

and i decided i could no longer hide

i have been well groomed in the ways of all actions

and don't want to be doomed seeking satisfaction

i seek to be sought and i seek to be found

but i seek to be worthy of higher ground

what woman is worthy of a man who doesn't seek to understand his plan

what man is worthy of a woman who doesn't see her truly within

unraveled in thoughts and wrapped up in love

but i am alone since i am undiscovered

and surrounded by options of attaining a lover

when what i need is the ONE who will not go away

who'll hold me if i say i am not okay

who'll hold my soft heart and appreciate my art

who can accept the return and know that's he's earned


I am alone because he's so raveled up

in seeking to fill his cup

that's running over with love that's bottled up

with pressure that is meant for only me to feel

I am alone because i seek the REAL

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Just some ramblings that made sense to me....

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Afzal Shauq's picture

a good poem... just go on and add more.. well done