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anger, first there is anger

at you, at me, at the world, at life

anger deep red like theNilepost Moses

strong as thousands of slaves searching for the promise land

behind it runs the blame

for leaving, for lying, for hurting me,

for not doing what you said you’d do, for shutting down,

for giving up on us, for never being an us in the first place

after that walks regret

slow and sad and bitter melancholy

how did I stop seeing you? and why did I lie when

you tried and tried and tried and I still said “not good enough”

after that stands reflection

frozen in time like glass, transparent

yet resembling something like the image of a woman

trapped behind a shrew screaming “STOP THIS! JUST LOVE HIM”

there lies the truth

saying “I can let this go, I’ve let love go before”

and “maybe it’s for the best, we simply do not work…

there are other fish in the sea” and “ I will find someone else who fits me”

under that is me

shinning, out stretched like a star,

taking all the space I dare take, knowing that truth means well,

is just trying to save me some pain, thinks she is just in her speech

and beneath me is you

that calm, loving, reassuring you

trying to crawl to the surface and remind me who you are

struggling to press back against the weight upon your shoulders