2002 Poetry

inside the operating room
i was lying half conscious
i heard the doctor spanked
my baby’s bum and a cry

one year had gone by so quickly
we could only think of the best
celebration to give our first baby
the pink dress suited her beauty
the color you opted for her to wear
on her first natal party

my days followed assiduously
portraying a wife, a mother,
and a maid, but who cares,
i love what i do because i
do things for the two of you

years have gone by so quickly
well-nigh unnoticed of our little
darling’s nearing the age of tough
adventures and more expenses
so you decided to go abroad to
seek for a greener pasture

now for the first time i was left
on my own, to decide crucial
matters all by myself
i’m not used to this and maybe
i can never get used to this
correspondences couldn’t satisfy
situations needing prompt decision
and so i realize how we made money
so important that it should have to be
the crossroad for a family to stay
healthy and going—it shouldn’t be

i can be a working mother, a wife and
a maid, but i cannot be a father
i could never fill your part, there
is no replacing you as the father, our
daughter needs you to channel her life
in the course that we want her to be

i can only role play, the function
remains with the true person and
that is you my--husband, i can’t be
a father and a mother at the same time
i want our daughter to grow in a normal
way wherein both her parents would be
there to be her beacon in the night

written 12/30/2002

Author's Notes/Comments: 

parenting is a huge task and no matter how one tried to be both still the fact reamins one needs the other to complete the task. Can't do it by myself i need my better half to do it.

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Joel's picture

A year has passed and now I found your site again and now and now and now I am a father. I read more than once because it tells me, in my case, that she does need me. Not just her but the 9mth bundle of trouble & joy.


"You think Einstein walked around thinking everyone was a bunch of dumb-shits?"

Corey Fox's picture

neither one of us is the "better half", however i get Your meaning - nice description/vivid picture