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GIVER'S REGRET
Folder:
JOURNAL # 40
as much as my ego
tries to storm my soul
in these moments
I won't allow it
the siege it wants
to take place
I won't collapse
under its spell
I won't swim through
those murky waters
of misunderstanding
I'll just let be
what is happening
and place no attachment
on its outcome or meaning
no more reacting
I'll take what comes
and give as good as I get
when one gives too much
of one's self
one only gets bogged down
in 'Giver's Regret'
this I must to myself admit
but I'm learning
I always over do
and the ego in me
cries foul
but I am fast realizing
I am enough
just as I am
I cannot allow
others insensitivity
to be an irritant
to my skin
just because
it looks to me
like I'm hardly
even thought of
that's a perception
of mine only I
have to work on
I won't
be sad
I most refuse
in myself
even that charity
I'll just rely on me
more and more
and let
all these vague
empty feelings
pass me by
wearily
unfed......................
(March 19, 2011 739am)
