Why

Why would you do this to me

These feelings are to painful and achy 

Did you even think of my feelings 

Or do ijust make you that unhappy 

 

Why couldn't you just leave 

It's obvious you didn't need me 

It's sad you didn't think how this was going to affect our family

 

Why won't this pain go away

I assumed if I forgave you, it wouldn't stay

Please don't make me regret giving you a second chance 

I seriously need to know if your going to be an actual man

 

Why can't you tell me it's going to be okay

And that your going to be here to stay

Prove to me that your family ain't worth losing over your stupid selfish idiotic mistake

Why can't you tell me you truly love me and our family 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is my first poem I have written in years, so pleasegive me yur honest opinion and any suggestions...

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word_man's picture

touching write

touching write

nightlight1220's picture

I would work on grammar. In

I would work on grammar. In other words...what reads better?

 

"WHY would you do this to me???"

"Why won't this pain go away??"

 

Or 

"Why would you do this to me"

"Why won't this pain go away"

 

See the difference?

...

 

 

 


...and he asked her, "do you write poetry? Because I feel as if I am the ink that flows from your quill."

"No", she replied, "but I have experienced it. "

 

Morningglory's picture

Sounds honest and painful.

Sounds honest and painful. Like you have a lot more emotion to pour out through poetry. Keep writing! Welcome back to PP!


Copyright © morningglory

allets's picture

Feeling Pain

says it concisely without all the fluff - no achy needed, if you feel pain it IS achy. You're is you are, your is possesive as in your smile, your poetry - watch your line lengths - hope this helps get your groove back ~Stella~

 

.

You left

I felt pain.

You are not

coming back

but you

should. And

soon.

.

~A~