An uneasy surrender

If I drink more than I should 

it is to bring your ghost back to me. 

 

I remember the moment - the walls shook;

the floor was the ceiling. 

These were not my feet, those were not my hands, 

As if I were not really there.

 

Then later, when they'd all gone,

I sat in a room that was bigger than before.

The air became thick and the light grew dim,

my name became weary and my shadow grew thin.

 

But there is no-one to tell it to. 

 

Drinking is the closest thing -

though I hate it - 

Drinking is the closest thing

to that first moment.

With silent tears and creeping fears

comes a fading hope of change.

If I drink too much it is to bring 

the ghost of you home someday.

allets's picture

Lots Of Anguish Here

Well described, felt - slc


 

 

S74rw4rd's picture

Wow!  This reminds me so much

Wow!  This reminds me so much of the aftermath of the end of my "first love," in 1978, that shattered my life, and took another fourteen years to get over.  Booze was not a factor, but the process was the same.  Although it not longer hurts (thanks to my second wife), the scars never really leave me.


Starward