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Starting with a scratch

Just to see what the pain feels like

Just one

But it feels way too good



The comes another

Not deep enough to bleed

Just deep enough to hurt



Next I find something sharper

Pressing it down harder

Surely enough,

It starts to bleed



One cut,

Followed by another

Then somemore

Wonder how to hide it

So that nobody will know



Years of cutting

Years of pain

I try to stop it, but I am too addicted

It is like I am in a drought,

Praying for rain

It will never come



Now I am beyond too far gone

Without a knife,

It feels so wrong

So instead,

I inflict different pain

I burn my skin

Or punch myself

Biting is not out of reach



How could I feel so much defeat

I would give anything to die

But I know that would only amuse you

So I keep on living

Merely surviving

It is a living nightmare

All the whispers,

Secrets and lies

Can't you hear me,

Can't you hear my painful filled cries?