Stuck Inside A Gameshow!

Jus 4 Fun

My alarm clock goes off, with a 'DING, DING, DING!'

Not your normal, awakening ring!

I trudge to the kitchen, to put on a pot.

Posing by the fridge(in her sequined gown), that darn hostess with the beautyspot!

I say to her, 'I need to get in there.'

She smiles and says, 'You mean in THIS NEW FRIDGEDAIR?!'

I push her aside, 'Get out of my way!'

Open the door to find, a years supply of Swanson's Souffle!

'Great!' I say. 'Now what will I make?'

The host appears and answers, 'How bout a Duncan Hine's cake?

Just tell me the price, and it can be yours!

It can be found in all your favorite, grocery stores!'

I throw up my hands, 'I give up!'

and pour myself, a nice hot cup.

Then I go to the washer, to put in a load.

I notice some curtains, as to it, I strode.

The host jumps over, and says to me,

'Do you want what's behind, curtain one, two or three?'

I struggle for my patience, to slowly take hold.

When an announcer's voice says, 'Today's show is brought to you by BOLD!'

I say, 'Just forget it! I'm off to the store!'

And that darn host is there...blocking the door!

His flashy white teeth are all that I see.

He asks, 'Do you want, door one, door two...or three?'

I scream at him, 'Get out of my home!

Take all your friends and leave me alone!'

'Oh', he says, 'I'm sorry...wrong answer.

But as a consellation you get...some laundry enhancer!'

'UGH!' I cry, and run out of the room.

The announcer announces, 'After this commercial break, we'll be back soon!'

With my aching head in hands, I start to bawl.

And the host says aloud, 'Don't forget, yesterday you won that supply of Tylenol!

Pull yourself together, its time for round two!

You give the answer, after I give the clue!'

I can only stare at him, for a quick pause.

Then I hear the sound of taped applause!

I pick up the TV remote, trying to escape this scene.

I turn it on and see myself on the screen!

I say outloud, 'I need to run far!!!!'

The announcer says, 'How about...IN YOUR BRAND NEW CAR??!!'

This is so utterly maddening, hour after hour!

So I escape upstairs, to take a long shower.

As I undress, and am about to step in...

the hostess appears, and pulls aside the cutain!

I grab a towel, and quickly wrap it around.

Then push her in the water, in her sequined gown!!!

I head to my bedroom to take a nap.

My head is pounding from all of this crap!

In the middle of my room, is a big wheel with lights!

The host yells, 'SPIN!!!!'...and I'm ready to fight!

I grab a sharp spoke, from off that big wheel,

and chase after the host who screams, 'Come on!!! Let's Make A Deal!!!'

So it looks like I've won, at least for today, I know.

For it seems I am stuck, inside a gameshow!!!!

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written: 07/23/02

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