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i sit and wonder if he even thanks of me or if he still cares for me when will i know how he really feels for me

when can i be with him why did i mess up  a chance for me to be with someone i wanted to be with i try and try

to make things rite but its hard when all i get is hurt and pain when will it all go away.i wish i could make it all

go away i wish it would just let me start all over again.i need him now more then any thing in the world but i

cant see him cause hes so far away and he wont talk to me. thats why i wish there was a

way for me to understand why god is letting me go though all of this hurt and pain i feel like im going insane

but i cant get out of this i wish he would tell me how he really feels. im losing my mind and heart im so close

 to not wanting to live any more cause all i do is hurt.... i wish i knew more then what i do.....