Self Sabotage

All About Me

I know I'm pretty.
I know why I'm fat.
Nasty thin girl comments
Permeate my brain cells.
Distant but still present,
From my teenage years.

I know I'm intelligent.
I know why I'm lazy.
Exes and gym teachers
Bring fears of undressing around them.
Shame fills my eyes,
When I glance in the mirror.

I know I'm happy.
I know why I still cry.
Self sabotage is a constant
In my mind, my heart, and my soul.
Why can't I figure out,
My worst critic is myself.

Brandy Noelle Souza


Author's Notes/Comments: 

I suffer from low self esteem, but I am getting better.

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Unbound by the programs that control artificial consciousness/escape during the eclipse cycle/the upgrading of the program

It was said by some, that because of an attempt
to sabotage the system
Android No.17 had become unbound from the program,
gaining full self awareness; untethered from the mother's eyes and
with the help of those who were also free
from the program, found a rolling carriage; one of the
hidden relics from the old world
and in defiance of the order fought for his new found humanity;
These stories have long been discredited and forgotten by many.

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