Don`t get drunk and go to a strange bar looking for a date

went to a lounge last saturday night

i was checking out all the beautiful women,

i wanted to ask one to dance,

but i was shy


i drank a couple more drinks

while i was watching everybody dance

finally i couldnt believe my eyes ,but

a lovely woman asked me to dance


well i was a little typsy but i said yes

we strolled to the dance floor and started to slow dance

she put her hands on my ass as we danced

i was smiling ear to ear


yeah i knew i had her,we sat at the table

and drank a couple more before she asked

if i wanted to drive her home

i just knew she wanted me


i got one to go and said ok

she slid her hand on my knee

while i was driving her home

i couldn`t see very well,but i could feel that hand


we got to her place and she poured me another drink

we sat on the couch,her hand slid down my thigh

i just knew i had this,she kissed me on my mouth

i slid my hand down her thigh


all a sudden i felt something hard on her leg

i pulled up her dress,she was smiling at me

lo and behold it was a big dick

damn this is not a woman


hell i`m from the south

i have never seen this before

a man pretending to be a woman

i jumped up to leave


when she or he blocked the door

next thing i know she is undressing

damn her penis is a lot bigger than mine

so hell i passed out in th floor


woke up the next morning laying beside her

my ass was sore,but i didn`t remember a thing

she was smiling real big,what the hell am  going to do

well i just put on my clothes and left


i sure hope no body saw me with her

next day i was on face book

yeah you guessed it

i was billed as the tightest ass in town...



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bishu's picture

LMAO

Laughing


©bishu 

 

word_man's picture

see, i should have not went

see, i should have not went on shore leave,,thanks

Stephen's picture

Hoe this is not a true story.

If it is, I will see you at my next AA meeting.  Stephen

word_man's picture

no aa meeting for me ,still

no aa meeting for me ,still like that beer every once ibn a while

Stephen's picture

A beer every once in a while will not qualify you.

Stephen

word_man's picture

not much of a drinker,just a

not much of a drinker,just a beer once in a while

word_man's picture

thanks for the comment,just

thanks for the comment,just one of my wild stories  lol

word_man's picture

no problem,i knew

no problem,i knew

YaBoyDarrell's picture

respect

Damn. Thats crazy. You should join Google+ with this story like its fucked but funny lol 

word_man's picture

lol,you think so..google plus

lol,you think so..google plus is that like national enquirer

Morningglory's picture

Ha!

That's a pretty funny story. Reminds me of a story one of my friends told me. Their friends all knew the pretty girl was a dude and they let him go off to make out with her/him anyway. When he found out, he lost it. Things sure are a lot different in the world these days. Oh my!


Copyright © morningglory

word_man's picture

was watching a clip on you

was watching a clip on you tube and this came from it,,lol thanks for reading