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doubt and regret
The most potent and devastating weapon a person could ever come across is doubt and regret.
These emotions. feelings have entities of themselves
it feels as if something parasitic and viral like creature is eating your main organs from the inside out.
Tearing small pieces of flesh of your heart till nothing is left.
Just the empty void it leaves when these organs vanish,
There seems to be bigger holes then the organs that were once there.
Because nothing no matter how large or how perfect your new found replacement is
will fit in the holes of the missing spaces in your heart left by doubt and regret
Will never stop the constant pain and and aching you do over time.
Its like an emotion deep cut. It bleeds and never heals.
But sadly you cannot die from overflowing terrible irrational thoughts like you can with dying from loss of blood.
There is no stitching the wound. It just keeps eating you away eroding your body of all joy and stability.
These two things I will say with adding emphases on the already terrible sounding words.
Doubt and Regret.
Is what makes or breaks a man. Its a force unseen many can overcome it.
Some are succumbed to living with the terrible relentless emotions all their life.
With little coping skills. It usually ends in isolation and hibernation from everything and everyone you love.
These feelings make you vanish. They show you how to disappear.
Its a sharp knife of a life altering mistake.
An event or list of events and mistakes leading up to a huge flip in your mentality.
Everything changes even almost 100% percent of the time location and geography change as well.
Leaving you in a foreign land where you are left to over think and destroy yourself from your own head.
Living like a meaningless sleepless nocturnal parasite
where you feed on your own dreadful emotions and everyone's kindness and hospitality around them.
I seem to always end up at the dead end wall of the wrong road
caused by confidentially making to many wrong turns hoping I will find the road I have been looking for.
witch usually ends up in a not all the time metaphorically collision
leaving you breathless and emptier than you ever were before.
I would say this describes the story of my faulty life all to well.
wow amazing!
Very true. I though have found learning to forgive yourself helps to close the gaps. We are what we are weak creatures, who endeavour to be strong we can only achieve this to some degree with resilience, known as the ability to bounce back after failure. Awesome write! Cheers SS
Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS
"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."