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His heart beats loudly as his fingers

Intertwine in my hair. Our legs braid together 

Fused like one. My hands glide up and down his chest. 

Our eyes close. A sudden pulse on my torso 

Causes me to reach for the bomb. Little did I know, 

How soon it would detonate. I look at the cellular device,

Its from her.

Daniel, I do so much for you. And this is what 

I get in return. 

My face burns crimson. “Kelsey! Kelsey?”

His body jolts forward. My hand reaches his face.

His face turns away, on impact. 

I toss the phone at his body, as I lose all breath.

Daniel, I do so much for you. And this is what 

I get in return.

The text floats into my mind, as I drown.

Thoughts whirr, stirring up a giant wave.

It crashes out of me as I begin to recount all the times 

He was unfaithful. All the times he made me feel like 

Less of a person, as I took him back each time.

“How many times are you going to do this to me? 

Do you enjoy destroying me over and over? 

Ripping me apart limb from limb. Chomping away 

At any of the confidence I have clung onto. Making me

Know I’m as ugly as I feel. Not pretty enough 

To maintain your loyalty?”

I wait for the same response I have heard

Countless times before. He looks deep into 

My eyes, before striking the same whip that

Lashes me, no matter when.

“I didn’t do anything.”

His answer feels like a massive rock.

Blocking my waves from crashing over 

Back into the shallowness. 

For a moment the water stands still.

Memories rise like soft crests, then 

Fall back into the dark troughs. 

The pain comes back, a never ending tide.

The abyss erupts underneath. 

“I can’t. I just can’t do this to myself anymore.”

The storm reads loud and clear. His face flushes

As he comes to realization that our final raft 

Has finally sunk. He tries to embrace me.  

“Leave, now.”

His body clings tighter, refusing to sink.

“No, please, I love you.” For a second he rips me

Back into the dark waters of our love. 

I break the surface as he tries to cling on.

I see the rage come out of him

His anchor pulls farther down into the darkness.

His embrace turns rough as he closes in 

Like a shark out for blood. He rips and tears for me

Through the waves. “You can’t leave me alone

you can’t!”

I push him off, the moment leaving 

Stings on my body. I swim away to safety

Out into the night. I look at the stars for 

Comfort but their glow illuminates the 

Sadness in me.

Three years spent, riding the same wave.

Hoping that one day the water would break

Revealing the paradise, I thought we could reach.

That night, I began to sail towards my own utopia.