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Sweet Saturn's Lament
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Te Amo (Love, Love) On a moonlit isle eternal years from this earth
An endless night lies still frozen in birth
A large ghost-white moon is slung low in the sky
Waning and waxing as time dawdles by
The waters are calm on Sweet Saturn
The bright stars look down from their cradle of black
To a sad-eyed young man who stares at them back
He lies unadorned, his skin deathly white
As happiness, like the sun, has gone from his site
The waters are calm on Sweet Saturn
The days and the weeks and the months and the years
Pass ceaseless through an hourglass along with his tears
He stays there unmoving, eyes unblinking they see
His lungs full of clean air, his mind of ennui
A lonely peace is upon Sweet Saturn
For near an eternity time has stood still
The warm winds of change have bent to his will
Until, for a moment, there appeared in the sky
A shimmering comet quietly passing by
The calm waters stirred on Sweet Saturn
The man, who for so long had lain in soft peace
Could not look away as his eyes had their feast
As he lay there transfixed by the glistening light
An angel’s face appeared, his heart it took flight
He rose from the sand on Sweet Saturn
Perhaps not an angel but she looked like one so
Her lips were rose petals, her skin it was snow
Pink cherry blossoms in her hair, oh so free
Danced all about her as she said, “Come with me”
He moved from the waters of Sweet Saturn
In his heart the man knew not so perfect a match
Would he ever again have the privilege to catch
She reached down to him, and he took her cool hand
And together they flew from the lonely isle’s sand
The night still encompassed Sweet Saturn
On the comet they traversed the black sky without end
The man’s pains of loneliness were beginning to mend
As the feeling of joy he felt with her divine
Began to appear as a love for all time
He pushed his thoughts from Sweet Saturn
They saw on their journey most beautiful sights
Blue starry nebulas and red dancing lights
Of planets, their oceans a sweet emerald green
These sights, while alone, he’d never have seen
His mind had forgotten Sweet Saturn
It occurred to him then that fate had been kind
Allowing him to leave his solitude behind
Until, in a moment, his lady she said,
“I grow tired of this love. Our passion is dead”
His thoughts once again found Sweet Saturn
She bid him farewell, prayed that he’d go far
She breathed one last kiss, floated off on a star
He wept for so long that his tear wells went dry
He willed the comet’s course and emitted a sigh
He traveled back to Sweet Saturn
The large ghost-white moon slung low in the sky
Mouthed a sad greeting as he shot on by
To the moonlit isle the broken man did fly
He waded offshore, his intention to die
He drowned in the waters of Sweet Saturn
Hey!
I was moved to comment more on the "author's comment" as opposed to the poem itself (which was a solid piece of craftsmanship)--the old saw "ignorance is bliss" is true, but sadly, the reverse property of equality also applies to it (thus, bliss is often ignorance). Given the choice (not that I, personally, have any choice in the matter anymore), I'd choose to be informed, and thus a little wiser, as uppposed to blissfully ignorant (and thus wide open to get knocked about again). Eh, I'm rambling. At any rate, keep on writing!
Todd
Brilliantly constructed ballad, superb!
Starward
stephen,this is a wonderful poem,i love it when i find someone who can write a long poem thats not repetitive and keeps my attention and this one definitely did,it is wonderfully done!its really sadly beautiful,sad ones are the best for some strange twisted reason!~elohim bless~
~*Guinevere*~
Beautiful work. Excellent. Keep writing.