I'm just a man with simple tastes

some sixty years of age

when I was young things

 seemed pretty good

my life style all the rage

But lately my wife's been


that love I do not show

and I ask of her, just keep it quiet

don't let the whole world know

I hate to think of this just now

but I'm just a bloomin' mess

but i'm working on it very hard

on this i must confess

So I took a trip to see the Doc.

and he suggested many things

a small incision in one special spot

would cause my wife to sing

and so I said O K to that

for I thought to check it out

for what used to be my sex appeal

is now my water spout

Then came the day awaited for

and I lay on that clinic bed

oh the pain I had to bare

and i wish that I was dead

well instructions came with surgery

on things you need to do

and I sat red faced and so ashamed

do I have to do THAT too

so I got to feeling better

but I feel just like a cown

cause I knew how to pump

the darn thing up

bu forgot how to get it down

So to the doctor once gain

a long coat placed in front

for the friend that I had chosen

had surely been no runt

But I've got things down now, pretty good

'bout stuff I need to do

and I have no more complaining wife

i hear her singing too

Well now my life is full and fine

this I must reveal

for what used to be my water spout

is now my sex appeal




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