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Nocturnes: Are We There Yet?
May I tell you of that place we call . . . There?
The light like cinders' dying glow, the air
is like a pall upon a corpse gone gray;
and not much difference between night and day.
Rising nightmares devour our sinking dreams;
words that we once exchanged are turned to screams.
Thought is hardly accomplished, and the brain
becomes only a register of pain,
unmitigated torture, agony
extended through us exponentially.
This is our sort's assigned eternity---
this unrelenting, unchanging despair.
You do not now need to hear more from me:
your Here---long gone; now you, with us, are There!
Starward
Cue the surreal and menacing
Cue the surreal and menacing music . . .
Truly awesome, the clutching power you unleashed in this brilliantly terrifying lament written from the POV of the denizens of "There". The poem moves with a cleverly plodding, dirge-like cadence through increasing levels of "unrelenting, unchanging despair" until finally "There" becomes "Here".
The progression of horror is consuming because the gravity of the speakers' collective voice and the viewpoint put the reader right into the center of the ring. It's an immersive wordscape, an audacious poetic feat, a success.
Congratulations on this!
Thank you very much for your
Thank you very much for your perceptive and complimentary comment. Some years ago---perhaps more than a decade---a former member of PostPoems challenged me to write a poem in which would, in a short space, present an entire ghost story, with an implied backstory and a semse of dread and foreboding. I think . . . I hope . . . that this one might qualify to fulfill that challenge. Thanks again for your kind comment. I apologize for my dely in acknowledging it, I am very unwell right now.
Starward
You were certainly up to the
You were certainly up to the task and you should thank that person for unleasing some of the best your imagination can offer. You achieved your goal on every criteria, and that was no small accomplishment, in fact, this is one of the greatest showcases of talent.
Keeping you in my prayers. Be well, fine Poet.
Once again I failed to
Once again I failed to acknowledge these words in a timely manner and for that I apologize most sincerely and abjectly. And I also am very thankful for those words. I am sorry that I am having such a bad month,
Starward