I knew I loved you

Folder: 
Dear John

I knew I liked you when I saw that sweaty smile under that hat 

I knew I liked you when you tried to confuse me and all the girls. 

And somehow. I felt it. A small connection. For a second I felt seen in your eyes the first time I saw them. For a moment I felt hope. And I knew this wasn't going to just stop there. You're the first one to see me. 

In that moment I knew that our paths haven't finished crossing

But the timing felt right and wrong when I met you. 

Wrong as in I was taken. I was small. I was broken. And I was in the arms of someone else

But it felt right in your smile. In your perfect skin. In watching you laugh at work and enjoy life

And I wanted you then. You crossed my mind after after you disappeared even tho I belong to someone else. 

I asked around and it didn't get me much so I allowed my mind to erase the glimpse of hope I felt when I met you. 

Few months go by and our paths crossed. They kept crossing

Until we decided to not let them separate again. 

I knew I loved you. Before you or I were able to admit. I knew I love you when you laugh at my rediculous and crazy side

How you think my imperfection are remarkably cute

I knew I loved you when we would stay up talking on the phone about things that matter and some that don't. 

I knew I loved you. And it filled my heart with passion and fire I couldn't resist. I couldn't resist how you ignited my heart. 

You turned my world in a completely different direction. I felt things I've never felt being embraced in your arms. I loved you from the moment I laid my eyes on you 

I just didn't realize it till I kissed you

And I didn't want to admit it before you so my heart was completely exploding when I finally heard you say it

I was scared like a little girl and even more excited. 

I felt how a child feels growing up. Discovering the world in their own hypnotic way. It is so euphoric. I felt exotic. I felt such things unexplainable by words. I still can't explain it 

Such more mesmerizing is the world when you're younger. You feel like You can completely fly with the wind. Dive into the clouds. Swim deep in the sea and melt with the warmth of the summer sun. 

That's how you made me feel. And I knew I loved you. And I was going to love you more than i have ever loved a soul before. 

And that was new territory. I have had and still do to this moment battle fears and doubts with that place. A new area of the sea of love in which I am currently drowning in. 

And I don't want to loose that. I don't want to loose it with you and I don't want it with anyone else. No one in this world can do to me what you've done to me. I've surrendered to you. I loved you then and I love you now. Each day I fall deeply and oddly in love with you. And all of you. 

And I can't imagine a world without you now even tho I survived the world without you

The world is often dark and cold and I caved into it. But you pulled me out. You showed me things I've never seen. 

I knew I loved you. It's as simple as that. And I still know I love you. And my heart won't ever let go. 

I know I love with a love that will burn through time. A love that can destroy and rebuild. A love that is strong and ignited with passion so big that nothing can withstand it. 

 

I knew then, in the moment you looked at me. That sweaty smile under your hat, I knew in that moment that I was yours. And that's when my world began turning upside down. Or should I dare say right side up? 


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