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FINI
Why must i still care for you?
I don't know why,but i do.
You were once my everything.
You were once the world to me.
But you took my world,
You broke my heart.
You tore my every dream apart.
But i still dream of you sometimes,
In the silent still of the quiet night;
Of what could've been,
Of what i should've done,
Of what you'd have done,
Of what i should've said,
Of what you'd have said
If i'd had said
The lines i was supposed to say.
But it's all over now,
It's gone,it's dead.
Farewell,
Fini,
This is the end.
But that's the way
Love always goes.
Goodnight.
Good-bye.
The curtains close.
oh, that's sad. your thoughts are understood, but it's not the best poem I've read.
I don't know, maybe you don't care but I went to this other poetry site the other day and put up one of my poems. I got a load of criticisms, telling me not to 'tell' the reader what is happening like a story but to 'show' it to them through images and the senses. They suggested using metaphors rather than abstract ideas such as 'heart' and 'love' and 'life.' I don't know about you but I see their point and found it really useful. If you want to visit the site it's http://www.everypoet.org/pffa/ You might want to check out the 'Blurbs of Wisdom' board. Sorry...this is way too long...see you.
~Kate~