"I am Rodham"

Folder: 
Rex Songs' Remixes

by Jeph Johnson (with apologies to Helen Reddy)



I'm defeated, I am sore

I rigged elections once before
But I did it to a really nice old man
Not this crazy brutish boor
The media would not ignore
Hell, I even won the popular vote again! 


The press called me wise

And I wore it with no shame
The banks they helped me heist
From them look how much I've made
If I have to, I can wreck anything
I'm not wrong (wrong)
I am incredulous (incredulous)
I am Rodham


More than half the country hates me

But it only serves to make me
More determined to scare liberals from the polls
They hate my rival even stronger
But his followers are bonkers
Cuz they've watched all The Apprentice episodes


I'm queen of compromise

Which has left my party lame
Now the people pay the price
Less rights but entertained
If we have to, we can wreck anything
I'm not wrong (wrong)
I'm unelectable (I told ya so)
I am Rodham


I am Rodham watch my foe

Grabbing pussies, there he goes!
Spreading hateful rhetoric across the land
It's not your grandpa's G.O.P.
It's as Alt-Right as can be
More isms than cishet white men can stand


We used to have rights

But they'll take them all away
We all must pay the price
So he can make our country great
Now we have to...disgrace everything!
We were wrong (wrong)
We were deplorable (deplorable)
For a woman
Hillary Rodham
No longer viable
We were wrong

For a woman
Unelectable
We were wrong
Hillary Rodham

Author's Notes/Comments: 

2016, parody of "I am Woman" by Helen Reddy 

 

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