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for all and all it's hard to miss

the loveless feel of a stranger's kiss

he said its not you its me as he slowly walked away

life if we were to let the subject drop everything would be okay

all I did and could was stood there and silently

screamed into my soul no way

and suddenly in my head it came so clear

its not so much that he doesn't love me but that

he's gay

and though he's tried he can't make himself feel any

other way

so while we were together he assumed a role and played it

almost too well

I never saw the real man until today when his steely facade fell

now he's angry and torn

almost as much as my battered emotions are worn

like a puff of smoke our thought to be love is gone

what a joke

as if it were ever really there

on these very words I am about ready to choke

still he walks further and further away

now I realize its pointless to still care

as friends for each other we can never be there

what else of my shattered heart

with you can I share

now all that's left to do is stand stone still

only silently screaming and after him just stare

Goodbye I say sadly under my breath then I savagely

start to swear

well, I guess that's it

I didn't give up on us

he's the one who quit................

( written Jan 14, 1992)