The Art of Losing

There is skill involved

in abandonment.  

I have mastered the art

of pushing people away

to avoid their running

when the truth comes out.  

I blame what they’ve done

on rejection,

but I know it is my fault

they left.  

I could not expect most

to stick around

after the way I treat people.  

It’s my fatal flaw.  

I know how scared I am,

I fear they’ll see me  

as I really am  

and leave me.  

I can’t survive alone anymore;

I can’t hold on to life

without someone  

encouraging me.  

I’m so dependent on others

it’s frightening.  

All my life I pretended  

I could be on my own,

but it was a grand lie.

I need you so desperately;

I need you to remind me

it will be ok in the end.

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