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Go Ahead And Turn This Into An Acronym
The jam and the cake
were not separating.
And the fun
from last night's pillage
was quickly becoming
a foreign memory.
I don't remember the last time I've been
with a lady.
Maybe yesterday.
Maybe fourteen years ago.
I suppose things like that lose
their aesthetics after you lose
a limb.
And that third bullet
which bit my left calf six-
teen years ago
well
it still screams at me every time I
bend down
to take a shit.
My dog's lover died today.
Got thrown away in the trash. He
ripped it to shreds last week and has been
trying to remedy the poor beast
for the past 6 days.
It's been admirable to watch but
I've finally had enough.
I had enough of watching him struggle, trying to
put the fuzz back in place, attempting to
stitch the helpless thing
back together.
It was a lost cause.
It was once
a raccoon.
(I think).
So right after I put the food in his dish, I snuck over to where
he left it mangled in the living room, picked it up with tissue paper,
and threw it in the bathroom's trash.
He'll never find it. Dogs
never enter
the bathroom.
I accept your challenge..
I accept your challenge. Turn this into an acronym? Mm.. THIS = SHIT. How's that? Which reminds me of a joke. A woman gets to the office building she works in one morning and gets in the elevator. She turns to a man standing next to her and says 'TGIF'. The man responds 'SHIT'. She's perplexed by his response. She says to him again 'TGIF'. The man responds the same way..'SHIT' The woman is taken aback. She says to him 'Don't you know what TGIF means?' 'Sure I do. It means Thank God It's Friday'
She says to him 'So? What's your problem?' He says 'Do you know what SHIT means? 'No, what?' 'Sorry Honey It's Thursday'.
now you have me obsessing
now you have me obsessing over how I have never seen a dog enter a bathroom....
Much Love
Ashley