'11 HELP


"As I traveled my lonely path,
'a road' was paved over me.

I'm stuck between asphalt and dirt.
I'm stuck in my own fallen memories.

It's dark and lonely;
cold and soft below;
hot and rough above...

My mind is creating only what it remembers
rephrasing all that it has already written
I am congested, no longer smelling ink
I can not feel the sheet...
but, I continue writing on mass
My sight sees no beginning or end
I can not write myself out this time

As I realize I am living my life...
one word at a time,
days and nights were meaningless.
My thoughts no longer smiled nor wept.
Neither can be seen in darkness anyway.
Only the sound of my laughter
and/or cries can be heard.

'Somebody knew my whereabouts;'
happily put me away for good.
My thoughts began to speak...
'The blood had spilled and began to tell the tale
It's color screamed the tune as it trickled everywhere.
The knife just laughs as it sparingly fillets
ending who was doomed from the beginning.'

The darkness somehow whistled a riant tone...
'Not that I'm trying to kill you or
dispose of you with my words...
but if you attempt what I write,
which my intentions are not,
you will make me the prime suspect
obviously not responsible for your actions'

I laughed hoping to be heard by a soul
I began to believe I put myself in here
I did not want to believe I could go this far
now I'm beginning to ask for what I've avoided
It just doesn't come out correctly
My disoriented state spurts out 'phel'
I guess I 'phel' in the hole this time...

I am buried,
becoming brittle...

Embedded between a life or a death
lies my forgotten world...
Embedded in my own gloomy words,
lies my forgotten world...

Only with this four letter word,
to be remembered...

if I am not found very soon."

© David Joel Rodriguez

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Found this in a stash of paperwork going through my artwork. I tried to understand it. According to the date on the paper, I wrote it when I was working at a Psych Unit.

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Pattyamc's picture

This piece was so intense -

This piece was so intense - and then I read your note @ the end, and laughed. Makes perfect sense being in that enviorment, and having all that frenetic energy surrounding you.