The [Cumbrian] Pasty (for L. Winn)

Thou art alluring to mine eye this morn!

Those bronz-ed folds upon thy crescent mound,

Like piles of rusty leaves, adorn.

Thy glist'ning crust with tapered ends surrounds

The tangy meaty mash and swede inside.

Thou art more lovely in thy hot-plate home

Than any other pastries who reside

beside thee as usurpers to thy throne.

Thou hast a secret past the few now know:

Invented down the mines so long ago

By Cumbrians digging coal, and stolen south,

And bastardised with cider in the mouths

Of Cornish farmers. I smile with smug conceit

To think it's something northern that they eat.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A friend and colleague of mine is from Cornwall and vehemently supports anything from his home county. When I mentioned the idea of pasties coming from the Cumbrian mines he was very upset. I have no real evidence on the truth of my claim but it was a good wind-up.

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