Fear is the Mind Killer

I did not know why I was so filled with such fear

I should not have known this emotion any more

It is not as if I felt you were still so near

Not since you walked out on my heart through that door

I should not have felt fear when I walked down the street

Nor averted my eyes when lovers held hands

Hiding, shyly from each caring friend I did meet

Trying to bury this ugly shame in the sands

I could not eat for fear you'd snatch food from my mouth

Or walk in the sun lest you stalk me around town

Each time I would breathe, I'd look north, east and south

Frightened that your old auto would come run me down

I would cower in the dark and pull down the blind

When the telephone rang, I tried hard not to scream

Fear of your anger would overcome my weak mind

Sorrow and wet tears disturbed each deadly night's dream

Every young woman was under suspicion

Was that the one who took my sweet roses from me?

Who now slept beside you while I wept on and on?

Were you inviting her lies with sex or money?

Fear is the mind killer as everyone knows

But, I could not fight it no matter how hard I tried

I had to run far, to go where the west wind blows

To a new place of rest for my heart when I cried

And, now I am here, in a strange land far away

I walk freely in the sun  and friends, I have some

I live without fear of lovers when they do play

This is my sweet garden, my life  and my new home.


Amy Riberdy

Author's Notes/Comments: 

When one uses the power of fear to control & injure a spouse or loved one, it can be a terrible weapon that can damaged a person for life.
Only courage to face the fear,will end it. If one stands up to the selfishness & the hatred, it will bring peace.
I know.I am still recovering from PTSD & I will win this.....

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Cliff Siler's picture

Your poetry contains some key elements that most poetry today lacks. It seems to always remind people of hope or hopes, strength after and over weakness, full circle of life, not about giving up. I don't know what PTSD is but the world needs you and your words which stem from your soul, not just your heart. Beautiful poetess and poetry.

Karyn Indursky's picture

This is a very empowering, motivating, inspiring poem of acceptence and how strong someone has to be to move on from fear. It sounds easy to tell people not to live in fear because it will eat them from the inside out, but it is hard to do it when you're the one in the situation and your emotions don't care about rationality. You showed this and many other things throughout this poem without even using a character to show a part of your life. That is definitely courage on your behalf. I cannot comment you enough on this piece of writing or how you've moved on from what could have destroyed all the happiness left in your life. God bless you and please take care.

Richard H Elliott's picture

A fantastically strong and well expressed piece that no woman or man should ever need fear having to put this down. But we do, I know I do with the melees and misunderstandings met on the road.

It is so good seeing someone being emotionally honest.

Bluuty Good Piece!


Melvin Lee II's picture

Tis so true...Fear is a powerful weapon, but afterall it is STILL a weapon.
Love and concern...are the balm.

I guess all teachers should read this, too ~ Smilesz.

HAWK SQUAW's picture

I am so happy that you let me know you this one was posted.... I can so relate to this..... I too had to get away and took off for the west coast..... thank god for ways out when fear is killing us.... I have felt fear like this..... and sometimes I still suffer from somethings.... I can't stand for someone to come up behind me and touch me.... it scares the hell out of me..... I have cowered in the dark... and hide behind blinds.... freaked out to answer the door..... this one makes me have chills.... I hate to know that there are other women out there that are suffering from this same fear..... I pray that we all beat this soon...... thank you for sharing such open and honest emotions and thoughts......