My Pillow

I put myself in this situation 

I feel like my life is always rearranging

I'm constantly reminded of constant changes,

I'm sitting cold hungry confused and lonely

Waiting hating shaking taking all my mistakes

 

I look into the mirror 

Glaring back at the person I hate the most

The reflection of a failed miserable ghost

 

I have sheltered myself from existence

Hiding trying to find the way home

I have searched near and far

Long and hard over and under

But I'm still here 

 

I've tried yelling and writing messages on the wall

But they ignore them and cover them with paint

Can they not see me 

Can they not here me

What the hell am I doing here

I don't belong here

 

I wish I would of listened 

I wish I could take it back

I wish I could breath once again

 

But but but I can't because I'm dead

I'm dead D E A D dead

No heart beat

No movement not even a single wink

I'm dead

 

I thought I hated my life

I thought I wanted to die

I thought I didn't belong

 

I thought   yeah I guess I didn't think

I didn't think of how hard this would be 

On my friends my family

I guess I never knew how much I cared

 

But its too late  IT'S TOO DAMN LATE!!!

I CANT TAKE IT BACK 

THERE IS NO SECOND CHANCES

GET ME THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!!!

 

Hello hello hello damn it I'm still invisible

I'm not in heaven and I'm not in hell

Where am I!!!!

What is that smell!!

 

Hello hello anyone help me I'm trapped

I can't get out please save me!!

 

God damn it why can't anyone hear me 

Help help let me out

I don't want to be dead 

I don't want to not live

I know I made a mistake

Please I'm not ready to say goodbye

 

Hello hello (follow me child)

I can hear you can you hear me

(Yes child you are safe now)

 

I want to go home I want to live

Can you help me

( yes child I can help you)

 

How how to I get back home

(Open your eyes child) 

 

Omg they see me I'm alive I'm alive

 

Wait are you god! 

(No child I'm the pillow you put over your face)

(I'm the pain u tried to erase)

(I'm the love you tried to embrace)

 

But but am I dead

(No child your not dead)

(You just experienced a simulation of death)

 

Now go live your life and be happy

 

Wait what is your name?

(My name is.....

 

The end

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Awesome right I know, I had this come to me so fast hope you enjoyed

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hopelessly-candid's picture

this poem is so

this poem is so captivating..... you're almost entracted by this feeling of hopelessness and heartache and also regret.... it's really quite fantastic because I feel like I am experiencing all of this first-hand while I'm reading.

elliot_jordan2003's picture

Believe it or not I shocked

Believe it or not I shocked myself reading it. I can't believe I wrote it lol