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Oil of Synchronicity*
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Oil of Synchronicity Versions Her life was run on the oil of synchronicity,
planted in the seduction of abstract hypotheses.
The moons and ebbs of tides,
swoop in like thunderclaps
racing in on wing'ed lightning bolts,
capturing energy,
wiping out synergy,
till she huddles in a pile of her own failure,
tucking up her toes to avoid the floods,
admiring and condemning
the rain soaked
howling at her gate.
perfectly beautiful
A particularly vivid image...
she huddles in a pile of her own failure,
Tucking up her toes to avoid the floods
Delicate, eloquent, distinctly human – perfectly beautiful
Thank you
My favorite poem, I believe it captures my life in the first two lines. A critique I recieved from a cherished source said that planted did not go with the oil theme of my first lines. I said it was two different thoughts running on oil of synchronicity and planting your life in the seduction of abstract hypothesis. But Ive considered changing planted to fueled by the seduction. or generated by the seduction...Any thoughts?