My broken heart won't heal.

How do you fix something thats so far undone that it just don't get better,

when do you wake up and realize what you done was the wrong choice,

for better or worse the wrong choices are not to be the right ones written on letters,

but perhaps the right choices can fix things slowly but to make the right choice, your decision.


Leaves fall off trees in the fall like people fall when they are ill and cannot carry on,

the colors turn red, orange, and yellow, but people turn blue when their cold,

have you ever felt their hand when they were there dead and cold, unmoving,

willing them to wake up, move, do anything of a sign to show their heart is living,

but they just kept saying "he's gone", "he's not coming back", thats all I was told.


Out in the sun wishing everyone would go away and stop lying so wrongly,

waiting for a pulse, begging him to wake up and stop laying there so dead,

screaming in my mind to please get up, give me a sign your there and living,

nothing shows, crying and finally realizing that he left me for good and It's read,

he's gone, not coming back so I gotta face the truth and be strong but I am not strong.


Rivers flow for so many reasons we don't know but they flow to a beat,

our heart flows to the beat of love, hate, pleasing, but a cold heart is silent,

all that flows is air threw the cells and they soon begin to fade and they all turn to dirt,

returning to God's purpose in life but it just seems so unfair and so unimaginable to think about,

flowers smell so deep and lovely, yet death reaks of death, the smell of rotten flesh to the heart.


I don't want to move on without my brother gone and in another place, I wanted to join him many times,

trying to just disapear to make the pain go away, hanging over me like the sky on my shoulders,

taking breaths wears me out so much all I can do is let tears role down my face and stain my cheeks,

I never been one to trust any who hurt me, like a lost child wandering life alone, with no one,

Love never feels the same after so much damage has been done to a heart, it hurts to think of him....


Like a dagger stabbing every part of my body but my heart to kill me to stop the pain,

screaming for someone to hear me and to understand what I been going threw to calm me,

all I heard was "I'm so sorry, or We give our hearts to you." That means nothing to what I feel,

The world spins every day like our life grows much too fast, never been one to be patient,

all I want is to be loved, all I feel is broken, empty, betrayed, sick, ill, like I'll never heal.




Author's Notes/Comments: 

My little brothers death.

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