WHAT I HEARD...

Folder: 
AJAH

I breathe a sigh of relief,

And I wipe away the tears.

My shoulders now eased,

And my heart no longer aching.



There will be no more talk of leaving,

The guise of running away defeated.



How many times,

Did she throw the carcasses of her life in front of me...

"Here!  Here!

This is what you're getting!

You are just going to kick me out like everyone else did.

No one likes me,

No one cares,

You'll see you'll be like the rest."



I smiled and replied,

"This doesn't matter to me,

I still love you!"



"But why?"



And I'd go and list,

over and over,

All those wonderful things I saw in her.



"You're crazy!"



I never lifted my hand in violence to her,

I never beat her down like the rest,

I never let her forget that I loved her.



And she left,

I thought forever.

My heart ached so much.



I thought she was choosing to have abuse over life.



Then she came back.

Again with the leaving,

The suicide attempts.



I grew weary,

But I never gave in.



"Why do you love me?"



"I'm not fighting with you anymore.

I'm not engaging you in conversation that allows you

To belittle, humiliate, and beat yourself up anymore.

Why do I love you?

Just accept it, because some things just are.

And what you don't seem to understand is,

Not only is my love here in open arms,

But it has always been free.

There is no cost,

No hidden agenda,

No requirement of you.

You've thrown your skeletons at me,

And I have not flinched.

You've tried suicide,

And everytime I find you in the future,

Struggling...

I will always make that call,

I believe in you.

My love will not ever die.

It will be here tonight, tomorrow, and forever.

And what is more,

You can not stop my love,

And I'll never stop loving you."



She turned with her arms in the air,

Grimacing,

I didn't know if she would hold on to me for dear life,

Or kick me in hatred just for loving her.



Finally she turned,

Eyes filled with tears,

Her sobbing limp body clung to my chest.



"I Love You.

I mean it,

I really mean it."



I held her and allowed her to let everything go,

Knowing all the while that this was my gift...

She was allowing me into her heart.



She said..."I LOVE YOU"

What I heard was, "Thank-you for loving me."



We have been together ever since...

And I will always be the better for it.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Forever my love, Ajah D. Yancey.

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