I read,

Astounded by your verse.

I see your words,

Gentle as breezes,

Warm as sunsets, skinny dipping in a pond

    On a hot summer day.

You wrote these lines,

For him,

For me,

Now you write them for her.

I am astounded by time...

At how the interval is nearly the same...

From your first committed bliss.

Every detail overlaps in sequence in the next relationship.

Like your love life is some kind of automatic machine.


I hope you truely find love...real LOVE.

Because you did not find it,

    With your past lovers...

    With your lover before me...

    With me...

And are with her.

I do not know HER,

She may be a dream...

She may fulfill your every desire...

She may even become your married partner...

You may even take her last name...

But I pray that you work out,


If you had as many partners before me,

And have not learned, nor found love,

What makes you think this is "the one"?

Have you told her you were pregnant yet?

Have you told her about your son Drew?

Have you told her about your other children who died?

Have you told her about your degrees?

Have you told her the TRUTH...

     That none of these exist?

Are you going to be there to help put the pieces together...

    When you tear her world apart?

    When she finds out how fake you can be?

Or will you file another "Protection from stalking order"--

    Like you did with Richard,

    Like you did with Trent,

    Like you did with me?

It's funny how everyone is seeing your life patterns--

    BUT YOU.

Have you even introduced her to your mother?

Or is this why you are moving out of state?

To keep all of us distanced?

To keep us all guessing what the truth really was? is?

I feel sorry for you,

You have lied so much until,

     You cannot see what the lies are,

     You cannot differentiate between fact from fiction.

     Of what you said in which relationship.

How many times have you told of the birth-story of "Drew"...


I pray that she finds all she wants in you,

For eternity.

I pray that you give her everthing, as she deserves it,


But for you, I pray for nothing.

You wouldn't deserve a love like that.

You've kicked every lovebird out of your nest,

You've deafened your ears to every doted sweet nothing,

You've left anything that was real...

    Whether it was from Gordon,

                   from Richard,

                   from Trent,

                   from Chris,

                   from Annette,

                   Or from me.

I pray for happiness for her,

For God's ultimate will for you,

And Peace for me.

Because for all of us,

It's been long over-due.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

My ex, though unofficial, suffers from Ficticious Disorder...a process of telling believable lies for the sake of importance/attention.  She has had according to her, had more than 50+ sexual partners, and around 13 relationships.  I've also heard via from these same "old" acquaintances and friends, that her 50+ is more like 80-85+. She's is only 31 years old, and I pray that she's not sexually addicted, as I'm sure this is how most of her relationships start.  But I am tired, and I hope that her partner will survive what may be the most devastating blows of her life when this all falls away.  And if it is a relationship that lasts, blessed be.  I still somedays, wonder, what in the heck did I fall in love with, if everything my ex said was best selling fiction.  Those who have known her prior to me, knew what she was like, and I've pretty much figured out that she's had 6 pregnancies since 1996.  All resulting in death, or mis-carraige...(with no body traceable--she donated it to science).  It does look visually believable, clear down to contractions--Doctors call it a phantom pregnancy, when a woman wants a child so bad, the body just emulates the wishes of the mind, even though no baby is there.  I saw her have contractions...I believed.  If you can, pray for my ex, and her's a cruel enough world.

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