PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

His mother gave me a blanket. A small silk white one with lace edging and little angel wings sewed onto the back. She said the white stood for pureness, your last name, and the wings because you were an angel sent from God. The lace edging was because you were a small delicate baby.
She said that it smelled like a baby and I imagined what that was like.
I imagined baby powder, diapers, and the faint smell of flowers. I could see a little face smiling back at me.
A tiny round soft face staring back at me with dark eyes and his light brown hair.
But then I realize the face isn't there and it won't be.
I crawl into your bed and curl up so tight in the blanket I feel like I would rip it
I hold the blanket and feel the skin like softness that I wanted to feel
And I cry. Because that is all I can do and all I am capable of.
I hear the door open and I know he arrived from his flight from France.
He doesn’t call my name because he knows where I am and what I'm doing.
I hear him walk in but I cannot stop crying about what I have lost.
He tries to pull the blanket away so he can hold me but I don't let him. Not Yet.
I need to feel what it would be like to hold you in my arms and hold you tight while you sleep.
He knows I will not let go of the blanket so he just holds me in his lap and rocks me gently.
So I cry more with each movement. He whispers to me many things and I only catch a few.
He says he does not think less of me and he still loves me, that in fact he loves me more.
But how could he? After I lost you, after I had let you go from my grasp.
I stop crying after a while and I just rock back and forth.
And I smell the blanket to see if I could smell what you would be like.
But all I smell is the scent of a box in an attic.
And I know I won't get to hold you. So I just rock back and forth and fall asleep on the blanket.
And so does your daddy. And I want you to know that I miss you.