over analyzing

life has changed so much. I am not sure where I am headed anymore. I am not worried. This road, at times it has been overbearing. Its consumed many things I loved. I am lost in my head trying to figure out my past. I have left many things in the dust. I got misguided. I am looked at with a lot of disgust. I just want to prove the world wrong. For once be right. Instead of staying up all night. trying to understand why everything played out this way. I have too many memories that I wish to forget. To many nights I dream of that haven't happened yet. I am losing all feeling. Comfortably numb. am I lost or found? Confusion. delirium. I thought I fell in love once. but I am realizing more and more everyday I was just blinded by my thoughts. I give up on my feelings. I let things play out. whatever happens. happens. Im sick of putting in work to see no success. I am slightly stressed. Trying to comprehend what it is I need to be doing. with all this time I have been wasting. I could have saved at least something. But I got nothing. No words or ideas come to mind. I live each day blind. I let myself drift. its easier that way. Instead of trying to have a foundation and forcing myself to stay. I lost much motivation in the past month. I am tired. nothing has been going to plan. I had the energy sucked right out of me. I am at a loss for words. until I figure it out I will get up. and go to work. hoping that it will work. to keep me in the right mind. until I find my calling. and have the money to do what I wish to do. I feel stuck. But I am wishing for some good luck.

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Morningglory's picture

Except for the going to work

Except for the going to work part (no job) this whole piece sounded just like my thoughts of late. Yes, over analyzing.

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