Fool for love

Folder: 
Confusion

Could I have fallen so fast,

crashed into the rocks on the sea.



Thought I was past this,

blocking it from my mind, blocking you.



See you look at her,

the daughter I loved alone,

without a father.



Recognize the love in your eyes,

I feel it too,

our daughter, our miracle.



Your eyes meet mine,

you smile, and for a minute I smile back,

but what I didn't know then was that something had changed.



I feel your elation,

happy for you,

hoping she can heal you,

like no one ever could.



Try to talk to you,

feeling foolish,

why am I bothering?



We have a friendship,

a daughter.



Could there ever be more?



Don't want to ask,

to ask makes it real,

makes the target unguarded.



Instead, making conversation,

trying to continue, nothing's changed,

am I lying?



Wish I knew what to do about you,

why I feel something, even now.



I thought I was over it,

I thought I'd finally moved on.



Was it a lie?



Was I just trying to convince myself I had?



She says to stay with who I'm with,

to put you out of my mind,

god I'm trying.



Knowing you like someone else,

doubting it'd ever be me again.



Have no choice but to forget again,

were you never mine to have?

Author's Notes/Comments: 

don't know why I wrote this. it's the first time in weeks that I can write without something blocking me

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