Parts of me

A merry-go-round in my head,
emotions kept inside,
words bitten back.

I'd rather be alone,
when I can't tell which way is home,
yet you find me, as always in shadows.

Trying to move past the hurts,
break free of cobwebs,
trying to find peace again.

Freedom from pain,
spinning freely into a void,
can anyone see the turmoil,
the trap I've found myself in?

Everything's turned upside-down,
world's spinning out of my control,
yet I let it go, let it spin,
let myself fall with it into oblivion.

If this is the life I'm to lead,
watching the days and people go by,
I'll not fight it, not turn to anyone,
just let it spin.

Nothing else to lose,
my grip's slipping,
as you turn again from me,
walking farther away,
I can't keep you here.

Lost and empty,
watching everything I've loved,
stripped from me,
still my head is spinning.

I look in your eyes,
and I'm trying to find solid ground,
but it hurts to only look,
never touch.

So I give into chaos,
let it control me,
laying in the dark,
watching the life I lead,
everything I hold dear,
spin away from me once again.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

"Everything I know has let me down, so I will just let go; Let you turn me inside out, cause I know I'm not sure about anything but you"

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