missing the 2

what am i to do? i am not the only one missing you

but i knew you, i know you in ways that lit my life from invisible

your mommy the only one who could see you as only i do

for mommies are the ones who mold shape and care for you

held you close my butterfly and firefly but then you flew

and now i am to begin anew

or is it going on?

they keep telling me to be strong

so i wander around confused acting like nothing's wrong

wondering why i didn't get to hold you for as long

as i will love you

the how is what kills me every time and sets forth these rhymes

so now i shine cuz of the grime of the crime

no one has stepped up and said

it was me who peed the bed and put the lead in you heart and slowed your heavy step

i hurt while the world continues to spin and i cannot begin to describe the many ways

every time i open my mouth my thoughts stray to the days when you were here and i had no real fears holding all that i hold dear near

and though i am surrounded i am alone

who you were at the core only i will truly ever know

2 parents who feel pain but only one took the blow

dying to live as the other dies to grow

apart like when you left as the years flow to and fro

but around the world rolls on and many right their wrongs and

they tell me to live on or live on and be strong while i gauge what went wrong in songs

you brought a lot of good with you coming and going

alot of lessons learned as i'm still growing

alone and frustrated as i seek to be elevated from the pains that i debated falling into in the first place

viewing disgrace

it's not that i don't see the good but days like this make me miss when you would smile and ask if you were good

i should just walk away with my memories and leave the past and let it be but remembering you sets me free

as i smile and remember our glee

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