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Locking lips with addiction

I said I never would

but that night it was different

and at his door I stood

He reached up my shirt

and undid years and years of pain

he found the switch to my demeanors

re-lit my flickering flames

I felt so interconnected; a part of something

he knew I never had

but still then I cried oh "woe, is me!"

and I didn't know things had yet to get so bad

Cheating on addiction with addiction

loving the eyes I gazed in and the scrathes I craved-

to inflict on myself and still expect 

him to be there in a place only space for one lover to stay

And in the same breath he kissed me

in my mouth he left a sigh

then I knew I only had myself and

only myself to despise