My first hard love

Slam 'oems

My first hard love was a dirty deed done behind the closed doors of hotel bedroom with a heavy heart and a full glass of water. 

This girl- was my rock,

a rock with a side of vitamin D to help with the come down so I would never know depression. 

This girl took me both brain and body and chips me of my old prescriptions

like dried white paint on the concrete wall in a high school building. 

breaching me of that old sterile feeling 

because I never really minded being dirty in the first place. 

My fingers ran through every womans hair feeling every strand please the tendon because box braids are...really-really soft..

But unfortunately this love was never good for me. 

Because how could I add a hard drug to my dietary plan 

my first love wasnt just a pretty face in a crowded hall  

Because to my friends she was just the girl next door 

but to me Molly was my only shot at happiness 

and the fact I woke up the next morning, just as happy just a sane. 

made the fact that it was real so much worse. 

For I needed my depression to bring me back down and remind me that none of it was real so i wouldnt make the dumb mistake again. 

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