Cat the Bounty Hunter

I'm a bounty hunter and my name is Cat.

But people don't give a man respect with a name like that.

I called myself Dog at first but I didn't realize that name was stolen.

The real Dog beat me senseless and my face is still swollen.

Bailjumpers always kick my ass when I try to bring them in.

I made a pass at Dog's wife and he beat the hell out of me again.

When I tried to bring a man in yesterday, he hit me in the balls with a bat.

He hit them so hard that he mashed them flat.

They look like two tiny pancakes and they're bruised.

Being a bounty hunter wasn't a good career for me to choose.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is a fictional poem

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