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Kept it much too long

I'm sure

But somehow just could't see fit

To part  with it

Till now

When I was younger

It was kinda cute

A real neat topic of conversion

But now that I'm a woman

The guys I date

Don't find it at all appealing

And so I've made a choice

To at last

Have this dead weight removed

All I need now?

A little extra dough

To help pay for it

One less fat girl in the world

Can't beat that

So what do you say?

Will you help me?

Drop these very much unwanted lbs

I'll pay you back

Every last cent

Or hey maybe there's even another way....

Far cheaper.....

Anybody got a vaccum cleaner....?

I'll even throw this

Into the deal

Couples who want but can't have

You can have mine

Yeah, sure for now the kids just a corpse

But hey you can always keep him in a jar

Love him from afar

Till that time comes around

When that classic Frankenstein story becomes reality

Do we have a deal, people?

Huh?

Why are you all looking at me  that way?

And who the hell are those guys in the little white jackets?

2013 Ramona Aborted By Mom Thompson