Quest for the Rain Goddess (short story)

-3- Short Stories

A short time ago, there lived a house. In it, lived three mice but that is irrelevant to the story.  One day it stopped raining and everyone was happy. Every two except little Richard. Did I say little? Ok good. Not the actor little Richard just a boy with no pens. What was I saying? Oh yes… little Richard dang that’s too long to right we'll call him little R for short. Arg, so anyhay, little Z wasn't happy the rain had ended. He wanted the world too be unhappy because he was a selfish little twit. He quested out to find the holy grail, I mean the Rain Goddess, because she was in change of the weather you understand? And so, little Z, grabs his backpack, his grandfathers walking cane, (who by the way can't talk without it) and his sisters sunglasses because he was spoiled good and always stole from her. The twit. Not him, her.  

On his way he ran into a mailbox. Literally… it hurt him. He yelled, "GOSH DARN IT TO HECK!" A man in a black cape levitated from behind the bushes and said, "Twat is the matter witch you?"  "Ware can I fine the Rain Goddess?" asked little R. The black masked man thing squinted his eyes tryin to look mysterious but it wasn’t working, and slowly raised his arm pointing upwards. "Follow de yellow brick rodent."  And POOF! a peered a rat made out of red brick. It scurried down the hill and little R was out of shape but he managed to walk after it.  The rodent went so slow that little Z lost him.  "DAG NABBIT" bellowed little R.

"Who wants to know?" squekd a voice.

"Who wants to know, who wants to know?" replied little R.

"Zuh? Someone called me name."

"What be your name?"

"Dag Nabbit, the rabbi rabbit."

"A rabbit that’s a rabbi?"

"You is correct."

"They call you Dag Nabbit, ay?"



"Whose they?"


"I'm a rabbit."

"I nose… but what do they call you?"




"What are you called??"

"Nag Dabbit!"

Little R was confused so he gave up. "Tell me how to seek the Rain Goddess."

"In a word search?"

"No, the rain goddess. I need to talk to her." says little R.

Dag Nabbit starred at little Z for quite some time before he said, "Oh, you mean Rainah…the rain goddess. I will go with you. Rainah, bee a good friend of mind." And off hopped the rabbit, and off skipped little R, in the opposite direction.  

Many days past, and still the sun signed. You know, cuz the moon was deaf. It was getting on kettle T's nerves. I mean, little R's. "How far is she?"

"Just over the hill, but I can't go with you then, we've had some problems in the past, she doesn't like me much." says Dag.

"I taught you were friends?"

Dag laughed historically, "She costs too much."

As day reached the hill, Dag left and little R was once again on his own. Dag stole the sunglasses by the way. The hill was smothered in flowers and the scent burned his nose. Mosquitoes buzzed about his face and sucked his blood…but that didn’t bother him cuz he was a vampire, did I not tell you that? Oh I didn't… well now you know. He swept in dirt that night. Stupid twit forgot he had a sleeping bag. But, at last he reached the Queendom in witch the Rain Goddess lived. Except, she didn't live there anymore cuz she died the night before. Little R had a feet stroke, collapsed and died as well. But on the upside, it did rain the next day.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

i was trying to be like John Lennon when i wrote this a couple of years ago

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