passing time

its wet outside

the fog reminds me of home

takes me back to better days

and some I just soon forget

some friends denied my worth

and even though it hurts

I can stagger on

with a drink in my hand

a boy at my side

maybe a girl in my bed too

just to add to the confusion

of my own sexuality

prying eyes watch

they wait for me to admit

the unhappiness

that I ain't feeling  yet

nope I ain't feeling it yet

your on my phone

your name in neon

asking me to answer

but I aint ready yet

still gotta paint my face

put on that plastic smile

she said  I like to wear

I'm having a little trouble tonight

can I borrow your skill

old friend?

you were better at it than I

a strength I still admire

I study her pain

swallow all the  words

its comforting to see her hurt

its not like I want to feel that way

but I do

and I don't mind it one bit

nope old friend

not one bit

he's on my phone again

still not ready yet

I'm trying to remember my thoughts

stumbling over my words

what do I seek

I often ask my self

I think I'm just passing time

yes, think I'm just passing time

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