Statistically Should of Died

Folder: 
Queen of Hearts

January 14, 2014

 

It was twelve weeks straight

I can bet that not a soul could relate

I bled so heavy for that long

All along I knew that something was wrong

 

NO ONE knows that I wanted to die

I told you but you didn't see until that day in July

I listened to everyone that didn't know the extent of what was wrong

I kept going to a place where I felt I didn't belong

 

It was suppose to be completely normal

You know abortion was on a Monday is completely informal

The bleeding would stop, for weeks I kept being told

I should of been 18 weeks along, yet there was no baby bump to hold

 

I bled unimagable amounts of blood, nothing like any other

I was nothing more than a regretful mother

Killing a baby that was unborn

And in your eyes I was selfish to be so torn

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I was bleeding through a pad and down to my knee every 2 hours for 10 weeks. I hated myself and I couldn't bring myself to face the Dr who delivered my other beautiful perfect babies. I couldn't face the person who knew that I wanted nothing more than to be a mother and have more children. The Dr that knew that I believed that abortion is murder. But, a friend made me call my regular Dr even though I carried shame all over me. I was seen 30 mins after I called and explained what happened. Once in the office and after an exam I was told that I needed emergency surgery because the baby never fully expelled. At the rate of my bleeding my Dr told me if I would of waited any longer I would of bled out in my sleep.

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