Toxic Nightmare

Song Lyrics

Verse 1
Was so young
And so wrong 
About how 
I first saw you
Dare I say
Blinded first impressions
Beautiful and brilliant
Immediatley high up
On my list 
Of everything to me
So proud to call you family
Only to end up
In your eyes
Less than nothing
The loser you never wanted

You the reminder
I never needed
The reason I still
Cry myself to sleep at night
With memories
Of you making me 
Wanting to end it all
Dancing insanely in my mind
I'd ask how the fuck
You sleep at night
But to this very moment
You still see yourself

As always been right

A nightmare
For both parties
From the beginning 
Just too young at first
To truly see
What it was exactly
That with I was dealing
Was supposed to be family

Tell me something
Did you ever once love me

Or was that on my part
Nothing more
Than wishful thinking

Verse 2
Looked up to
And loved you
Almost to the point
Of worshipping you
And everything 
That you did do
Life did not go
Exactly to plan
But when it came to you
At first, somehow
That was ok
In my eyes you were

And in my mind you 
Could do no wrong
Look my dear
At where we started
And at where as of today
We did manage to end
You showed up
I didn't know it yet
The dream was over
As was my childhood
Eight years old
And fucked 
So blinded by 
My own innocence 
To understand 
What was really going on
As in your hatred
I continue to drown


Verse 3
Reaching out a hand to you
Sixteen years old now
Just hoping for someone 
I can talk to 
To finally be found
But all you did 
Was interrupt the words

Already painful
As hell to even think
Let alone say
To anybody
You looked me in the eyes
Called me a loser
Stated that my feelings
And my memories of hell
Where all just excuses
Told me to grow up
Said that you were
Just fucking done
Then before there was anything
I could think to say
You turned around 
And walked away
You gave up on me

That very day
And thanks to you
I did the same
I let you define me
And to this day
From you I fight
To get myself free
I hope your proud
As your toxicity continues
To pull me down
I hope you're happy
Tell me something
Are you proud



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