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Father, don’t you understand?

It hurts to know that you don’t care.

I wanted to see you—meet you for first,

but you won’t tell truth bare.



I tried……I really did.

Believe me, I’ve cried through nights,

just trying to comprehend

why, so hard, I fight.



You obviously want nothing.

You don’t want to know your daughter.

Who the fuck are you?

You sure as hell aren’t a father!



I wanted to welcome you back.

Greet you with an open embrace.

But you took all of my knowledge

and shoved it back in my face.



I wanted to, maybe, love you;

but you couldn’t fathom why,

your looks and charms belong to me

and how it passed you by.



You’ve caused so much damage.

Daddy, can’t you see?

You left everyone behind,

including your unknown daughter..….me.



Sometimes, I really hate you.

Wish death upon your soul.

Because you refuse to acknowledge,

my heart that bleeds from holes.



You will not fill the void

that resides inside my mind.

Closure you will not grant me

and solace I can’t find.



Sometimes, I cry out to nothing.

No one’s here as my skin peels.

This razor blade cuts me deep.

I bleed…..but I can’t feel.



Sometimes, I want to blame you.

You’re at fault for all my guilt.

You’re partly all the reasons

no one can shatter these walls I’ve built.



I, sometimes, want you to suffer

inside my silent hell.

Where all my love was stripped away

and I was left with nothing else.



Yet, sometimes, I want to forgive you

for your unintentional sins.

If only to satisfy the child within

who wonders where her daddy’s been.