Worthless & Shame

As I lie there feeling the suffer and pain,

I somehow ask God for forgiveness, 

I'm stuck by myself with a gun, bleach and razor blade,

Everybody has hurt me, downed me & has used me, 

I feel worthless its been centuries since I've seen the sun,

I feel like I'm drowning in a public pool and nobody can see me,

I've drowned myself in tears for several months now, 

I just want all the hurt, pain, and suffer to go away, 

As I cut deep,deep,deep, into my thighs, and wrists,

I ask my dear savour for forgiveness, 

I ask him to give me the strength to redeem myself. 


I ask my savour to give me my wortheness,

It just isn't enough, I go for the pills,

Next as I take 30 xanx I feel my self getting sleepy,

I doze off in a puddle of my own blood and sorrow,

Three seconds later I see myself sleeping, all my pain is gone,

As I go to the underworld looking for heaven, I tell my savour I'm sorry,

The pain for me is gone, but the pain is there for others, 

I'm sorry I could not do it anymore, hope you guys forgive me, 


                                                 I am sorry mommy, I love you..


Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this in the 7th grade. I am currently a sophomore. I have a big box of poems, and feel I should share them with you guys.

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