easier than this

i think what i wanted
was to walk into the bar
see you see me
and hate yourself for letting me get away
and i will look away
nonchalant
uncaring
knowing i feel neither
and i will not walk up to you to say hi
because then it shows i cared enough to do it first
and you will not walk up and say hi
i will never know why
and then
after the minimum number of drinks it takes us

we have courage to meet in the middle
i will remember the days
when we didn't have to play this game
when it was all
so much easier
than this

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