Author Information
AT A LOSS FOR WORDS
I’m speechless
I’m at a loss for words
I don’t know what to say
The decay, limpid destruction
accursed hatreds age old feuds
the knights in shining armor
begin to rust
the faded glory of medieval times
of post modern delusions
of equality
what with AIDS and censorship
with the winds of change
blowing a foul wind back
toward the past
with armies of the dull
& wretched
seeking passage backwards
to another era
seeking it myself
meditating on an empty stomach
eating hashish
instead of food
watching junkies and cops
collide in
abandoned warehouses
an ugly methanol fire
burns in my imagination
and I can’t put it out
just won’t pass
no water hose available
and it just won’t smother
under pressure
Hitler’s ghost was reborn
in Portland, Oregon
and saints are made
of murderers and false prohpets.
The devil in Koresh
corrupted the minds
of hundreds—perhaps more
and I’m at a loss for words
as to what to say
The orator silently
dashes off
unadulterated monologues
the death of Ryan White
didn’t make much sense
neither Lenny Bias
or Richard Brautigan
but we persist
persevere
through the endless smog
L.A. crumbled
Nike bankrupted the souls
of mindless youth
Educators took much
political correctness
and died of asphyxiation
no one cried
for the Central Park jogger
no one gave a fuck
about Yusef Hawkins
I didn’t even hear about
the death of the soul
The winged messenger
was silenced by a bribe
The golden tranquility
was shattered
pain surmounted
anger intensified
the alcohol numbed logic
long enough for a riot
to conquer quaint
New England town
What else new?
Four year old thrown
in a river by her father
a nagging recession
in the era of Clinton
with deities of green paper
heard in a restaurant
the cries of indigenous races
extinction of compassion
on the brink of fashion
on the cutting edge
of passion
I am at a loss for words
$275 haircuts
bully on the radio
comics persecuted for
inducing laughter
no one cried
but feelings were hurt
Aw, come on now
Who really gives a damn?
the fate of the planet
may be everyone’s responsibility
but everyone
is at liberty
to disagree
and everyone usurps hope
some unable to cope
fake orgasms are one thing
fake love is another
a bird in the tree sings
we have
no desire to listen
to the sweet melody
in harmonious gesture
the Bosnia and South Africa
keep the spirit
of Apartheid alive
thorns of hatred
rip the flesh
spitting out fertile blood
that goes uncultivated
Anger in Seattle
Hatred in Indonesia
Muslims spitting
venom at Jews
and vica versa
a dweeb named Yasir
all kinds of excuses
for inertness
My inaction is the result
of my loss of words
my inability
to communicate with anyone
My failure to respond
rooted in broken teeth
and stained, faded jeans
heard in a nutshell
music from another land
with strange language
intimidating my intellect
but enthralled
I continue to listen
I saw the wretched cry
I heard the crack of the whip
It’s sick crackle
fresh on my memory
screams are crying out
from each corner of the world
nobody home
the phone keeps ringing
I’m too tied up at the office
in mass global market confusion
the listening masses hunch
in this backroom abortion
The First Amendment
soaked in presidential urine
but
I fanatically gesture
for its resurrection
and inevitable rebirth;
an awakening of hope
my mystical yearning subsides
without realization
a shaman was not my destiny
neither guru or griot
those time honored ranks
denied me
not even a troubadour
Well, the whole world
is all fucked up
and I still don’t know
what to say or do
In this age of crisis
I find myself mute;
my mouth unable to move
silently peering on
at a total loss for words
5-26-93
