Reflections of "Life"

Never have I been "most" or of the masses,
diversity of experience has
helped cultivate an ability to
flow through different castes and classes.

Despite my initial attempts
to be living like a soulless heathen,
my general state of being
has always been the type seeking
for truth and reason
throughout all seasons,
generally working to be seeing
beyond the veil of that which is deceiving,
even amidst the subconscious
walls that may not really
be evident to us - the host beings.

At my early stages of life,
upon the first askings of "why?" -
"Why do we see?"
"Why do we think?"
"Do we really come from the sky?"
"Have we ever lived before?"
"Who is God?"
and "Who am I?"
I'd read through the books
supposedly inscribed by the wise,
starting that journey to uncover
the answers that seem to escape
most of our minds.

A paradox of naivete and old soul insight,
I suppose I'd never been destined
for the smooth and easy life.

An insatiable thirst to feed my mind,
boundless imagination to help guide
the direction of my personal flight
through this delicate balance between
free will and destiny's tides -
this crazy life.

And like any human I suffer from
weaknesses that make things hard,
such as stubborness, a little pride
and my tendency to emotionally break down into what appears to be
irreparable shards.

But appearances are deceiving,
a lesson I've learned repeatedly,
through this learning I've found
that evidently,
it's not all about word or deed simply,
but both go hand and hand most definitely.

In holding back one's truth but
executing actions inconsistent with the words
or speaking, writing and communicating aloud so that all thoughts have been heard,
but either one not backed by the other,
illusions persist, keeping us, our sisters
and brothers lost in confusion's ether.

We assume and we act
based not on fact,
but rather on that
which we've had
what might initially seem like
good reasons stacked
against that which would otherwise detract
from our desired continuation
along our future paths...

...and at times it seems easier
than dealing with other tracks.

But the reality remains the same,
that those of us who think beyond
the physical brain
and allow ourselves to feel across
existence's different planes
would find such a reality
lacking - such a shame... lame...

...lacking the enrichment that life
has to offer us through these type
of arduous lanes - the ups and the downs
that bring both joy and pain,
excitement and rest in between bouts
of the insane and the sane.

So though we may hit rock bottom at times,
as referenced often in my other rhymes,
those of us of this same fabric will rise
from seemingly irreparable pieces apart
to a united and much stronger type -
the mind, heart and soul that continues to survive through all periods of time.

From the depths of darkness
to the heights of the light,
these cycles are spirals
moving mostly upwards beyond
our limited earthly sky.

That's it for now as I reflect on
the people who surround my life
for the longest periods of time...

...none of us are the typical girls or guys,
but exceptions to the rules that would
otherwise limit folks like you and I.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I guess this was randomly inspired by some recent conversations w/ various friends and thoughts that there are those who try to melt in with the norm/standard, and there are those of us who navigate across different standards and norms... Some living entirely outside of the bounds of "standard" or "what should be".

I've never really fit in one group at a time, and it's been brought up from time to time about how I have a wide variety of folks whom I call "friends" that would otherwise not find themselves in one place and one time if it weren't for a gathering I might have coordinated. I guess I've always thought of it as folks from different eras/phases/workplaces, etc. But I realize that it's more or less just the type of folks that I keep in touch with... There is a certain common element among them all as either being a part of my family (no matter how close or distant in relationship) or being the type that isn't fully like the masses - folks that I generally can rely on to uphold a conversation about topics other than pop media or the weather (not that there's anything wrong with that). And while there are varying degrees of how unique I find these folks to be, there are the common elements of critical thinking, complex or well-thought out philosophies, personal fortidude and strengths that I may find inspiration in, etc...

I guess what that chalks up to is that I won't just surround myself with meaningless relationships, much less look to engage myself in one... And vice versa - I would hope that my existence isn't a detraction from someone else's and I hope not to ever have to rely too heavily on someone else without being able to be of equal or greater support to them as well... And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Just my random thoughts/notes on the inspirations for this piece.

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