Oh, I'm Proud Alright.

You know what? I love my country.
We don't rot our teeth with fancy tea,
Or enter other countries illegally.
We don't even start war unnecessarily...anymore.
(I hope.)

So I really do love the U.S. of A
Because we have the right to all we say
And we have the right to live another day
Governed by a country who've lost the American way.
(Always loopholes in the Constitution.)

I really love that I'm completely free
Stuck under glass that men can't see
But that's okay as long as there's Maternity Leave,
And I can be anything that I want to be.
(Except what I can't.)

So don't tell me you don't like the United States
Because other countries are filled with hate,
Starving alone without help from the state,
Or unable to move because they're overweight.
(But we're nothing alike.)

So remember that I love this land,
Because we have everything from trees to sand,
The Constitution's also very grand,
And neighbors will always lend a helping hand.
(If they have time.)

So I really do love this country,
The Land of the Free,
The land of hypocrisy.
This is the land that will always be home to me.
(Until Canada becomes independent.)

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this a long time ago while I was still an angsty teenager trying to be funny. I still like it a lot, so I keep it around. 

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